Maybe you’re wondering what the terms “FWB” actually means, maybe you’re considering that type of relationship, or maybe you’re wondering if you’re in that sort of situation. No matter the reason, you can learn all about the definition of friends with benefits and the rules that they typically need to follow to make it work out without any drama.
First of all, what’s the exact definition of FWB – friends with benefits? In the simplest cases, a friends with benefits relationship is when two people are involved physically and sexually, but they aren’t committed to each other in any way. They aren’t romantically involved with each other and aren’t limited to just being with each other.
To most people in friends with benefits relationship, they enjoy spending time with each other and hooking up, but they don’t have a connection with each other to start a fully committed relationship.
How to maintain the friends with benefits (FWB) relationship without hurting yourself? Here are 11 rules you need to obey:
1. Be honest with yourself and them
One of the most important things in being involved in a friends with benefits relationship is honesty. You have to be honest with yourself, if you feel uncomfortable or this isn’t what you want, don’t try to push through it until it does feel right. Let the other person know how you’re feeling, be honest and cut it off if it’s not right for you.
2. Be sexually open with them
The whole point of a friends with benefits relationship is to have great sex and enjoy it, so be open with your partner and let them know what you’re into and what you want. Be open to try new things with them too, seeing as they might have wants and desires that you’re not used to.
3. Take care of your body
Even though it’s not a romantic relationship, you still want to please them and be cleaned up for them. Make sure to obviously shower regularly, and keep your body smelling fresh, clean, and keep your legs nicely shaven. You should always be at your best for your hookup, considering all it’s all just sex and you want to please them just as much as they should be pleasing you.
4. Be emotionally prepared
Friends with benefits relationships can be hard to handle, and they definitely aren’t for everyone. If you become too attached, the whole situation falls apart and everything becomes much more difficult. You have to be ready for knowing that the relationship is only sexual and nothing else. If you’re not, that’s okay. You’ll just have to be prepared to walk away from the relationship if romance isn’t something they’re willing to move on to.
5. Always practice safe sex
You don’t really know how many other people your hookup is sleeping with, or how many they’ve been with in the past. It’s always best to wear a condom and be safe to avoid unwanted pregnancies and any STDs that may be lingering around. It’s a great idea to always be safe, so make sure you’re both protected while hooking up.
6. Don’t cuddle
One of the worst things that can be done in a friends with benefits relationship is cuddling. This intimate act can begin to create a bond between the two of you, making the relationship become intimate on top of the physical. If that begins to happen and one of you starts to fall, it can begin to get messy.
7. Don’t be clingy
Remember that you both aren’t committed to each other, so you don’t belong to each other. Don’t be clingy for attention and be asking to be with them all the time. They have a life outside of you, you’re most likely just a small part of it. Avoid talking to them on a daily and trying to be in contact with them regularly. The relationship shouldn’t go beyond just hooking up, so avoid talking about other things to keep it that way.
8. Don’t introduce them to your parents/friends
Another important thing to remember is that you shouldn’t be introducing them to your friends and family. You two are just hooking up and plan on being nothing more, so introducing them to your friends and family might give them the wrong idea. It can lead to a lot of uncomfortable questions, so it’s best to just keep it on the low altogether.
9. Don’t get jealous
It’s crucial to remember this! It can be hard to not get jealous if you’re aware that they’re with someone else, but you have to remember that they’re allowed to see other people. They aren’t your significant other, and they aren’t tied down to you. If they want to see other people, they can do whatever they want to. It’s your job to make sure that you don’t get jealous over them.
10. Don’t get mad if they meet someone
If one day your hookup tells you that they’ve met someone else and want to cut it off, don’t get mad at them. Friends with benefits relationships aren’t meant to be forever lasting, they’re only temporary and for sexual purposes. So when you or your hookup meet someone that they’re romantically interested in, you have to understand that it’s time to let them go and find something else for yourself.
11. Don’t stay the night
Just as cuddling is an intimate action, staying the night can also have a more romantic response to it. Falling asleep next to them and waking up to them after every hookup can have a major impact in either your feelings for them or theirs. It’s best to leave or make sure they leave after every hookup, rather than staying the night and possibly obtaining feelings of romantic attraction.
While having a friends with benefits relationship can be fun and enjoyable for some, for others it’s impossible to not get emotionally attached. A friends with benefits relationship isn’t for everyone, but it can be beneficial to others. Sometimes it takes testing the waters out to see if it’s right for you or not.